When you are in a military relationship, chances are, you are always being asked by your friends what it really feels like loving someone who is a thousand miles away from you, and chances are, no matter how you explain your thoughts and feelings to them, they will never understand you, unless they’ll experience it firsthand.
In behalf of the minority, and representing the “silent” background of the strife, allow me to share with you this reality, and what it really feels like loving a Soldier.
Nothing can change the fact that you are always the second (or third) priority in his life, because his duty will always be the first one (his family is second, unless you are already his family), until the very end of his service. You cannot complain why he is away, because after all, you are not his priority, and no matter how you want to be with him, chances are, you will always end up frustrated by the window pane, cuddling your cadet doll.
2. “Waiting in Vain”
You always turn your phone to its maximum possible volume plus turning the vibration setting on before you go to bed, because you won’t want to miss his call during the night, (and you also do not know what time he will call, that is).
3. Unanswered Text Messages Makes You Oh-so Sad 😦
Whether at work or at home, or even during your ride home, or just whenever, you practiced the habit of checking your phone every now and then with the hope of seeing his name in the lock screen; because maybe, just maybe, you haven’t felt your phone vibrating, when he texted you awhile back, so you’re just making sure. But still, no text, so you go back to experiencing #1 and #2.
Nothing will change the fact that your partner is a Soldier, fighting for the peace and order of the Nation. He is a property of the Government, so you know that when duty calls him, he must go. No more buts. Accept it or not, you don’t own him totally.
5. Deprived Of Sleep
This, too. You know you have to answer his call, even during your hospital duty, or office work, or during an important office meeting, or even during the wee hours of sleep, because you know that if you won’t answer, chances are, you might hear his voice again a week or two, later (when he passed the place where the phone signal is available). Sad to say, but it has gotten “ordinary” for military wives and girlfriends to be always looking “Puyat” (deprived of sleep).
6. Fearing the Unknown
This is true when he is still starting in the service. No excuses, but he should go to places where he will really hand out the M-16, load it up, and exercise the art of war. (I cannot specify any further how they really are when they’re out in the woods). So during his time in the field, you know very well that his one foot is already stepping on his own grave, and the other fighting for the nation, so you cannot do anything about it, but to become more of an Amazona, trying to win back your whole heart and whole being despite the fear, hoping to become even braver to accept the reality (of losing him, any time).
7. That feeling of Ugh-nnoyance when a friend or office mate of yours complains that she hasn’t seen her boyfriend yesterday, or even a week at that. –This, right?
How about us? We haven’t seen them in like… forever! But we hold our commitment and we stay true with our promise, that we will stay in love, and will always choose to love them, with or without appearance, or a phone call.
You know that no matter how tough your situation gets, you know very well that you are one of a kind, right? The type who doesn’t belong to the ordinary. Who needs a Prince Charming when you’re in love with a Soldier? The person you are loving is already a great person with character, the bonus part is, he is also wearing a uniform of honor, and prestige, and you get to love and accept the both, plus the highs and the lows of it, of course.
If you are a military Wife or a Girlfriend, or a friend of one, please feel free to share this for others to understand, TYSM! 🙂