“I WANT US TO LAST. I don’t want to have an amazing couple of months and then it be all over in a flash. I don’t want to experience the feelings of hurt, confusion, and disappointment again. No matter what we run into & no matter how hard things get, I WANT US TO STICK TOGETHER.” -Anonymous
1. Know the real essence of PRIVACY, and apply it.
Remember: Relationships last longer when nobody knows your business. So try to keep your ‘moments’ just between the two of you. It’s fine to post photos of you during an important event of your life because it’s a milestone, but too much posting of your photos and overly lovey dovey status updates actually won’t help your relationship. Not everything in your life is “postable” in your social media. Take note, it’s not the public’s relationship but yours. Also, when you fight, nobody else has to know. You don’t need to let anyone see your dirty laundry out of the bucket. So be careful.
2. Keeping Notes
Everything that’s happening in your life as a couple is a milestone. So it’s important you should document! It maybe cheesy for others to see if you are always capturing photos of you together, but that’s fine. It won’t hurt anyone, unless of course you post everything on Facebook! LOL. Take a lot of photos, and keep them in your files, later on, at least you have memories to reminisce as you move past your younger years together, as a couple. Own a camera and an external hard drive just for your photos together. Be creative, too, by compiling them in a scrap book or photo albums, or even mural of your photos together!
3. Do Not Rush!
Again, whether you’ve heard this before for the nth time, I’d still say, TIMING IS EVERYTHING. Not everything should be done shotgun or unplanned. Although majority would attest that things which happened spontaneously last, this is true, but it may not be the same with others. Love is not about sky diving, where you start at the top, and rush to the ground, it’s all about a step by step process which entails trial and error. At first it may get exciting, but there are certain days when you will find yourself in anguish. So that’s when the ‘DO NOT RUSH’ reminder comes in. Again, before you jump in a new commitment, assess yourself, are you really prepared for the roller coaster ride you are going to experience in a yet another relationship? If you answer this question and have thought of other significant priorities, I guess, you’re not ready yet, and chances are you will end up frustrated once you choose to enter a relationship, and you’re also responsible with the other person’s misery, too.
4. Crossing the line
Everything Done Horizontally Is Dangerous! If you know you are already a mature individual who could take the pressure and effects of premarital lovemaking, then fine, it’s nobody’s business. But if you are someone who preserves this for the love of her life (is there anyone who still believes in this?), then you might not want to cross the line. Remember that majority of the things you do horizontally, are the ones you cannot take back. In short, these things are irreversible. If you’re not ready, then don’t do it. TRUE LOVE WAITS.
5. Public Display of Affection
About PDA. Public Display of Affection is not necessary for couples who respect themselves and who maintain the respect of the public towards them. Don’t wait until someone will say, “Get a room, already!” It’s alright to let others know she’s your girlfriend by holding her hand while walking, but it’s very unattractive to see if you are already kissing up to your throats in front of the mass. How about the children? How about your parents? C’mon, get some values. Sooner or later, you will be parents, too, and you won’t want to see this in your children, either.
6. Meeting The Parents
Of course, one of the most momentous beacons your relationship could ever hurdle is meeting each other’s parents and relatives. It could cause you a bit of anxiety, but believe me, they are also nervous to meet you. Remember, just relax and be yourself. If you are a woman who isn’t fond of wearing mountain-high heels, then don’t. If you’re a woman who doesn’t wear makeup, then that’s fine. Just be your comfortable self. Take note of this: your partner’s parents are also ordinary individuals (like you) who are only trying to be parents. Get to know them according to their own individuality and uniqueness, and surely, you will capture their hearts.
7. Meeting The Gang
Relax, it’s just the gang! LOL. But actually, this is even more of a nerve-wracking experience you could ever get yourself into. However, you do not have to impress anyone just to turn them into your side or get their favor. Again, just be yourself, and try to know them individually. There’s a reason why they are your partner’s friends, and they were also the ones who stayed longer in your partner’s life than his/her family. So try to get along with the gang!
8. Respect is the Epitome of Love.
First of all, start with yourself. How do you regard yourself, is it with respect? How do you view other people? Do you respect them? Alex Elle once said, ‘The respect you show to others (or lack there of) is an immediate reflection on your self respect.’ This is very crucial in a relationship because how you view and respect yourself will be the way your significant other will view and respect you. Respect begets respect, and in a relationship, before you even start to love someone, you should begin respecting the person first.
9. Quality and Time
A quality relationship isn’t measured with the length of time from the day you started dating. It is measured with the quality you make out of the limited time you have. Remember that a relationship is not only about showing off, but it is all about being with someone who supports you until you reach your goals and dreams in life. The person who is always beside you especially during rough times.
“Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.” -Wayne Dyer
Love is not all about seeking your own happiness from someone. The purpose of relationships IS NOT to have another person to complete you. But to have another person whom to share your completeness with. Before you even start a relationship, you should ask yourself, what are your intentions? Do you take accountability afterwards? Do you take responsibility with the other person? Or are you only looking for your own happiness that’s why you want a relationship?
I remember appearing this in my newsfeed, and actually, it really makes sense.
Credits to the owner, Ogbolu Ezeugo Jerry
Don’t marry because of SEX,
Don’t marry because you are getting OLD,
Don’t marry because you are of AGE,
Don’t marry because you’re LONELY
Don’t marry because you need someone to support you FINANCIALLY
Don’t marry because you mistakenly got PREGNANT for him.
Don’t marry because you don’t want to LOSE thePERSON.
Don’t marry because of family PRESSURES
Don’t marry because you Like the IDEA Of Marriage
Don’t marry because of PITY or Out of PITY
Don’t marry because of TRIBE
Don’t marry because you admire all the WEDDING GOWNS you see
Don’t marry because you Love KIDS
Don’t marry because all your friends are getting Married
Don’t marry because of physical/academic qualifications
BUT, Marry because you are READY for it
Marry because of Love
Marry because you want to Fulfill your PURPOSE
Marry because you want to be a Good HELP MATE…
I PRAY TO GOD ALMIGHTY TO GIVE YOU ALL THE BEST LIFE PARTNERS WHO TRULY DESIRE TO MARRY YOU WITH THE RIGHT MOTIVES..
Above photo from Snapwire