To My Almost

We started rocky. It was one of the cliche things that happened to us. See, this isn’t the first time that we tried. The first time we failed yet when we found each other, we dared to try again, hoping that this moment will be our time. We were so optimistic that fate would favor us this time. We were happy. We were full of bliss. My day wouldn’t go by without you passing by my mind; yes, even when we were fighting, even when we weren’t in good mood.

It is so insane to miss someone whose memories are just abstract.
We weren’t the typical LDR. I am not sure if we had a relationship, even. It was the millennial thing- no label relationship. We were just talking- no, not talking per se, it was just an online banter. We talked over the phone for only more than an hour in our year-long ‘talking’ yet it meant the world to me. I was so invested in us. I was so excited for what the future holds for us even if there’s barely a present. It was very naive of me.

 

Everything was doing fine. I never think that everything will crumble. I told you before that if we get through this year, we will get through everything and I believed we could. I also believed that you believe we could. We agreed we will work for us, yet here we are halfway through 2017 and we’re acting like what happened for the past year is just an illusion for me. I frequently wonder what happened, how are you, does it pain you like it’s crushing me? Truthfully, I am not even mad at you. I understand you. I understand that what we had was difficult. I understand that having someone but not literally having someone is a losing battle. A battle against despair, longing and loneliness. I just hope you gave me much more credit that I would understand whatever reason you had. I’ve known you for a man who would stand by his words. I am devastated that I am wrong. Again. It saddens me that our second time was just like our first. A failure. And I know that I have my fair share of shortcomings. I was very clingy. I was bothered with all of the smallest things that I clearly shouldn’t have minded. And it consumed me. Uncertainty. Insecurity. I gladly embraced the connection I thought we had and held it so tight it might have smothered you. Or maybe this is the way of the universe to tell us that we are never meant for each other. This is my painful realization.

Goodbye and I wish you all the best.

Always,

VVD

——
ABOVE PHOTO FROM Tatiana VIA PEXELS.COM

GET YOUR FREE EBOOK COPY NOW!

Caps Lock CIL: The Unrequited Love

“Cupid sometimes runs out of arrows and only shoots one person instead of two.”

Once in our life, we experience loving someone without the knowledge of the person. We know how stupid the idea is, but we cannot help but choosing loving from a distance, because, at least, from there, we could express our feelings. Here is one good epitome of someone who chose to love from afar, and hoped, at least for once, that her love will be reciprocated.

(This article was originally published in The Corps Magazine, the Philippine Military Academy’s Cadet Corps Magazine, Alumni Issue 2013. Original title: “CAPS LOCK”)

**ADS HERE: EARN EXTRA ONLINE: CLICK ME TO FIND OUT**

Caps Lock

by Nuela Gracia F. Posadas

As we drive along the zigzag mud, I prayed to God
to keep this off my chest. I guessed He did, at least for a while.
Maybe I am unconsciously drawn to your world.
Maybe I do too, at the very rarest of times.
I believe that I belong to you as immediate family.
And this feeling attacks when I least expect it
When I am not in my best dress, When I did not get to shower,
and when I did not have the COURAGE to tell you.
And so I go on with my routine in life
smiling when not supposed to, running countless miles
to maintain my Superman strength disguised by my stick thin body,
juggling everything is served before me,
carrying that INTEGRITY you were always preaching excessively.
I become too preoccupied to even think about it, or perhaps about myself.
And yes, one day at a time, I go on with my random life;
lazing around in the mornings, skipping meals,
sleeping until my head hurts, and thinking about you until my heart breaks.
Yes, I think about you. I think about you all the time.
I sustain my LOYALTY to you even if I don’t have to,
even if there seems to be no apparent reason.
You, instead, go on with your life unaware of the single soul
wide awake on your lower bunk,
writing this note for the source of her unreciprocated love.
You go on…
You go on without the slightest idea.

***

“At least even for a little while, I was the reason behind your smile.”

Above Photo via picjumbo.com

Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

The Horrifying Boodle Bar Scene I’ve Witnessed

So I was writing about Food We’ve Missed From The Boodle Bar and it suddenly came into me that horrifying scene I saw with my own eyes.

WARNING: This will break your heart. I’m sorry.

This happened when my Cadet Boyfriend was still a Yearling Cadet. It was a Saturday, so may parada yata, or some sort of activities involving civilians na hindi ko na maalala kung ano. I came in early, like mga 1000H kasi based sa instructions saakin ni Cadet Sancho, mabilis lang daw matapos ang  activity nila, and baka nga magkaroon pa raw bigla ng priv, pero expect the worst naman lagi iyan ‘e . So iyon na ang mindset ko.

Very vague, ang facts lang meron ako, first, Sabado, second, may parada, third, may activity involving civilians. So ibig sabihin, wala ka talagang idea kung anong oras siya magka-open time niyan, and not to mention, Yearling Cadet siya, if you know what I mean..

Buti na lang may libro akong dala, I was so into it, I didn’t notice it was already 1130H. Ambilis ng oras, haha. Coolments lang tayo kasi Kadete ang boyfriend, ‘di uso sa Kaydet Girl ang demanding sa oras at magalitin, so diyan talaga ako kumapit sa idealismong ganiyan hahaha.

30 mins later, may dumating na isang Girl din. Based on my assessment, Kaydet Girl siya, 100 percent iyan. High heels, magarang Blouse, naka-dogtag, naka-Shoulder Bag, at nakaayos, at siyempre, may hawak na celfone.

**ADS HERE: EARN EXTRA ONLINE: CLICK ME TO FIND OUT**

Umupo siya sa tabi ko. Maalala ko lang kasi dito mismo sa litrato ng article na ‘to, iyong lay out ng upuan nun. May hawak siyang dalawang celfone and snacks and pasensiya na nakita ko kasi talaga dala niya ay Macaroons from Goldilocks hehe detail-oriented ako guys, pasensiya na.

Sobrang haba na ba iyong kwento ko at wala pa rin kayong makuhang horrifying? Wait for it.

So ayun, nakita niya kasi tahimik lang ako so lumipat siya sa pinakaunang chair malapit sa entrance ng Boodle Bar, so back to reading lang ako, until 30 mins later, nagfifidget na siya. Hindi siya mapakali, tatayo siya, uupo siya, tingin sa relo, tingin sa celfone, para bang naaasar na siya. Imagine 30 minutes pa lang siyang dumarating at naghihintay. 1000H ako dumating. 1200H na. Mas mahaba pa iyong panahon na naghintay ako compared sakanya (pero hindi naman ako nagcocompare, naisip ko lang din kasi, mas may karapatan pa sana akong magalit sakanya, pero ibibigay ko na kay Ate iyong eksena.)

**ADS HERE: PAANO KUMITA NG EXTRA SA INTERNET: CLICK ME TO FIND OUT**

Dumating iyong hinihintay niyang Cadet after 20minutes, so halos isang oras din siyang naghintay, guys, pero galit na talaga si Ate. Ito ang malupit, pagkadating ng Cadet niya, na super saya na makita siya, makikita mo talaga na naglight-up ang face ni Cadet makita si Ate sa Boodle Bar, pero instead na matamis na ngiti ang i-sukli ni Ate, habang papalapit si Cadet and mga 1 meter apart na sila, binato niya iyong celfone niya sa Kadete. OMY!!!!! Mama Mia!!! Hindi ko alam ang gagawin ko, titingin ba ako sa librong binabasa ko or what, grabe gulat ako, guys! Galit na galit si ate, after niyang ibato iyong celfone sa Kadete, at palagay ko nasaktan iyong Cadet kasi tumama sa tiyan niya iyong celfone then next niyang binato parang bagong sim card yata iyon na nakalagay pa sa bagong sim kit iyong parang nabibili sa tindahan na tig-50pesos na smart sim ganiyan (detail-oriented talaga).

Hindi na nagpatumpik-tumpik si ate, dali-dali siyang lumabas sa Boodle Bar matapos niyang hablutin iyong bag niya at supot na dala. Waiting lang ako baka kelangan niya ng assistance kasi sa taas ng heels niya baka ‘ka ko matapilok siya sa sobrang galit niya habang mag-walk out. Napa-stop lang iyong Cadet, ayokong makipag-eye to eye contact kasi alam ko classmate siya ni Sancho, tapos alam ko rin na kailangan niya ng kaybigan para parang mag-soften ng nangyari, pero hindi ako magaling sa part na iyon, and hindi ko siya personally kilala so nakayuko lang ako sa librong tapos ko na ring basahin.

After a split seconds, bigla na lang bumalik ang ebababs na hayop sa sama ng ugali, akala ko magsosorry siya, ito ang malupit, binato niya uli ung supot ng Macaroons sa Kadete. Grabe, hindi ako palaban or war freak na tao pero that time, gusto kong sumbatan iyong babae. Sobrang pambabastos iyong ginawa niya sa Kadete. Hindi na lang ba niya naisip na baka hindi na lang iyon kumain or baka nagtake life lang iyon para makita siya kaagad? Kasi iyong Cadet ko wala pa ‘e magkaklase naman sila.

Guys, kapag napapasubo tayo sa sitwasyon na galit na tayo, never maging option ang mambastos lalong-lalo na ng taong mahal natin sa buhay. Hindi sila perfect, hindi rin tayo perfect. Natural lang sigurong magalit, pero iyong gumawa ng eksena ay sumusobra na. Ako iyong hiyang-hiya dun sa mga Sir and Ma’am natin na ngbabantay ng Boodle Bar kasi siyempre marami na silang napa-graduate na Cadets, alam nila hirap ng Cadets araw-araw, but then, gaganunin lang sila? Hindi talaga makatarungan ang ginawa ni Ate. Sana lang, hindi na lang sana sila nagkatuluyan.. Kasi kung sakaling kaya niyang bastusin ang Military Officer na asawa niya, pano na lang siya mang-api o mang-bastos ng mga lower-ranked Officers and regular Soldiers in the future? Just my two cents. I don’t intend manira ng tao kasi hindi ko naman kilala si Ate hehe.. Naalala ko lang lahat ng ginawa niya kahit 7 years ago na iyon.

Sana magsilbing example saatin ito na kahit anong mangyari, mamahalin natin isa’t isa (ang ating own Soldier) kahit sobrang tested na iyong patience natin. After all, ang galit, lilipas iyan. Pero ang scar na dinulot mo sa isang tao dahil sa galit mo at pagpapahiya mo, mahirap iyan kalimutan. Ako nga bystander lang pero naalala ko pa lahat. Paano na lang si Cadet? 🙁 Haaays

“How they treat you is how they feel about you… Believe them.”

Read Related Article: Food We’ve Missed From The Boodle Bar

**ADS HERE: EARN EXTRA ONLINE: CLICK ME TO FIND OUT**

BLOG DISCLAIMER: This is a personal blog. Any views or opinions represented in this blog are personal and belong solely to the blog owner and do not represent those of people, institutions or organizations that the owner may or may not be associated with in professional or personal capacity, unless explicitly stated. The owner does not intend to change views about the PMA Cadet Corps or  Philippine Military Academy, any views or opinions are not intended to malign any religion, ethnic group, club, organization, company, or individual.

All content provided on this blog is for informational purposes only. The owner of this blog makes no representations as to the accuracy or completeness of any information on this site or found by following any link on this site.

Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

The Break-Up Story

Chapter 1: The Day I Got Over You

Chapter 2: The Art of Moving On

Chapter 3: Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

Chapter 4: To The Person Who Broke My Heart

Chapter 5: When Letting Go Is The Only Choice

After realizing I did everything to work things out, and tried to make amendments and bargain, I realized, I was so stupid to have gotten into this kind of situation, and staying in it for a bit longer. The worst part was, I was the only one who tried to fix everything. I was the only one who gave enough effort to put things back together. Because from the day you told me that you needed space, I never heard from you again.

Please do not blame me for letting us go on our separate ways, because from the time I felt you were getting cold, to the point that you never contacted me for a long time, it’s as if you just abandoned me. You never told me what you really wanted, you never asked me to listen or to understand you, you just left me hanging, and wondering what really went wrong. I’m sorry for doubting you for some time, because I believe, I also deserve some explanation.

The saddest part in our break-up was you didn’t tell me what went wrong, and what made you go. It’s more than acceptable to let you go knowing that you fell out of love, or you met someone else along the way. But we never had any discussion; and right now, that makes me even more aggressive to want to talk to you.

I know, it’s a bit absurd and unnecessary to communicate my feelings or doubts to you because that’s very pointless. The damage has been done, and I think, the only way I can do is to move on and let you go.

Lying in my cold room in this hot afternoon, I can see the sun rays penetrating through my glass doors, as I try to let go of my worries, I got up, and I realized there’s more to life than being worried sick or being lonely. I stood up in front of my study table, and for the nth time that I’m seeing this poster, I realized it has a point.

On my wall, written in bold letters, Someday, Someone will walk into your life, and make you realize, why it never worked out with anyone else.
I know, I never had any choice at all, because all you wanted was your life without me in it, and I know, you never want to see me again. I love you, or I must say, I loved you, but you chose to leave me, and I think it’s time to move on.

“You let go a long time ago, and I realize that, it’s time for me to do the same.”

Above photo from Matheus Bertelli via pexels.com

Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

The Break-Up Story

Chapter 1: The Day I Got Over You

Chapter 2: The Art of Moving On

 Chapter 3: Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

Whew. What a long day. I got back to my room without the intention of doing anything at all. I changed my clothes to my usual comfy Pjs and turned my radio on, with its maximum possible volume. I made sure my veranda is tightly closed so that my neighbors will not be disturbed by my loud music.

As I hear my make-me-feel-good song, Over You (Daughtry), my favorite song, at least for now, I just let my heart out and try to relive every word in it. I no longer care. I just sing as loud as possible until I can’t hear my voice anymore with its loudness.

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬

Well, I never saw it coming.

I should’ve started running

A long, long time ago.

And I never thought I’d doubt you,

I’m better off without you

More than you, more than you know.

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬

I never imagined myself liking this alternative kind of music but it really helped me get by every idle hour I have—alone by myself. Singing this song helped me become more huge and powerful.
Days gone by, I managed to survive every single day even without the company of my friends, because I know they also have errands to do, not just to take care of me. I got used to being with the company of my own self and I enjoyed every moment of alone time.

I sat down for a while, faced my study table and grabbed my journal. I scanned the pages and I saw my scribbles: my first name in his last. What-might-have-been my future name if I were to marry him in the future. What a jerk. Without even thinking, I tear off the page, crumpled it until I couldn’t give any more strength from my fist. I tried to do it again, until I attempted to tear it apart one part after another. Upon reaching my satisfaction to its very end, I flushed the pieces of paper down the drain—without looking back.

In my journal I started a new page, I wrote the usuals. The date today, the day, and the time. I begun with. “Where Do I Start From Here?” I thought of using bullets as my guide to a wonderful life celebrating my independence . I realized, Yay! I’m finally free! Free from the stress you were constantly giving me. Free from all those sleepless nights when I cry myself to sleep. Free from emotional harassment and the physical pain I felt right from the heart continuing through out my whole chest. Free from the thoughts of you hurting me again, with countless arguments we had when we were still together.

I started thinking what to write, then suddenly I realized that after this painful break-up, I only have two choices. It’s either to stay broken, or to start a new life. I chose the latter. So I started writing, #1 START A NEW LIFE. I know, everything will be new to me because you are no longer a part of my future plans. But that’s fine, because I now believe, I’m better off without you.
I continue to write and here’s what I ended up with:

20XX August 19 Thursday 1730Where Do I Start From Here?#1: START A NEW LIFE

      • Collect all his stuff and , or burn them! Oh and Clean my room.
      • Rearrange everything in my room!
      • Buy something new for my room (a vase, a poster, something new!) Oh, don’t forget to buy scented
      • candles!
      • Have a haircut
      • Treat myself in my favorite restaurant
      • Foot spa, Mani-Pedi
      • Bring out the artist in me (buy water-based paint and canvass and try painting using my barehands)
      • Why not… Adopt a puppy?
      • Finally enroll in postgrad
      • Short Course?
      • Travel Alone! First Destination: ______
      • Buy a new set of make-up, experiment; You Tube Tutorials)
      • Buy a new dress
      • Clean my closet
      • Start reading!
      • Collect something from now on
      • Visit Mom and Dad
      • Talk to a long lost friend
      • Start jogging?
      • Volunteer!
      • Watch a Movie Alone
      • Divert!
      • Divert!
      • Divert!

    I don’t even know where to start because I want to speed it up so that I could be better in a faster, unimaginable time. At first, I thought I want to get back on you for every pain you caused me, but later on I realized, it’s not worth it… for now, I will focus on becoming better. I want to gain myself back. I want to become what I might have been if I haven’t loved you. I want to become better again, and I want to start a new life free from the pain of the past.

    Above photo from Garon Piceli via pexels.com

    Continue Reading: To The Person Who Broke My Heart

    ***ADS HERE: IGNORE THIS ADS IF NOT INTERESTED***

    Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

    ***ADS HERE: IGNORE THIS ADS IF NOT INTERESTED***

The Art of Moving On

The Break-Up Story

Chapter 1: The Day I Got Over You

Chapter 2: The Art Of Moving On

Sitting by the doorway of my veranda connecting to my room, I grabbed the hot cup of coffee which I transferred in a wide-mouthed mug, I just let my skin feel the heat from the sun rays while holding my mug with both hands; and just let my palms feel the warmth of it, as I smell that distinct aroma. I realized, this day, I know I’m whole again.

Weeks have passed since I decided to move on, and get back on my feet. However impossible it was to survive a single day, I tried. I wasn’t sure if I will be able to get there, but I know for a fact I will. I cried my heart out, and just let myself feel that sharp and throbbing pain coming from my chest, radiating to my arms and gut, because the thought of you leaving is what I dreaded ever since.

This time, I realized you will no longer be with me, because I know, I am not your happiness. Looking back from all the things we did, and all the memories we shared, I know this may also give you pain, however difficult it is, I’m sure, you will no longer look for my comfort.

My life has been meaningful while I was with you, but thanks to all the pain I got, and the tears I shed, because now, I can see clearly. You were not the man for me, and this time, I’ve already accepted it.

What helped me moved on? I can’t really recall. What I did was to take one day at a time. One day at a time to feel that excruciating pain I got from breaking up with you. One day at a time to smile, no matter how difficult it was, I still did. One day at at time to put away all the things which reminded me of you, and one day at a time to feel stronger as I try to survive one day at a time.

***ADS HERE: Find Out How So Many Filipinos Around The World Are Making Full-Time Income ONLINE!***

Days have passed, I didn’t notice how the days gone so swiftly. I never intended to make others think I was not affected by our break up, but I just promised myself, I never want to be alone physically, as I try to forget you. So I decided to surround myself with people. I let them decide where to eat, what to do, or where to go. Because without them, I won’t be able to have any direction. We never talked about it because I asked them not to. I just faked my smiles, joined them with their loud laughters, and wore that party hat. Because I believe, no matter how difficult others will understand, I believe that I don’t owe anybody any explanation on how to fix myself. I just wanted to be okay.

Every single day I tried, no matter how difficult it was. I faked my smiles and laughters. I decided to be okay, and just keep on faking it…. until I made it… and now, I’m whole again…

Above photo from it’s me neosiam via pexels.com

Continue Reading: Where Do Broken Hearts Go?

Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

The Day I Got Over You

 

The Break-Up Story

Chapter 1: The Day I Got Over You

As I remember it vividly, thoughts from the past dawned on me, and had me pull over my sheets and attempted to curl my knees directing it to my whole heart, hoping not to feel that pain again. Thanks to the cool temperature of my AC, I almost had my flashback perfect as I feel the chill penetrating deep inside my bones, as if I am inside a cold and dark dungeon. As I try to remember it, I thought I wasn’t ready, but thanks to all the days I was just getting by; and those months I tried to bury every hurt that thrust my heart every now and then, because then, I’ve gotten perfectly strong and insurmountable.

The -5degC frostiness of my room woke me up, I tried to relax and just let my feelings drift me away. I was expecting to cry for a while, but this time, I wasn’t in the mood to cry again… because this time was different. I stretch my arms and legs and as I try to feel my heart beat, I wasn’t sure I was fine, but I still got up from my bed, turned off the AC, and pulled the curtains of my veranda to see the sun shining and feeling its heat right in my face.

As I see the same men down the building from my 4th floor hotel room, having their regular morning exercise, the wind blew my cheeks. As it flies my hair away from its place, I started to feel again. I thought, this time was different. I thought, this time it will only be me. A world full of colors and happiness as I try to put you aside and lock you behind the bars of the past. This time, this life is about me, and this time, it just occurred to me that the future belongs to me, without you in it.

***ADS HERE: Find Out How So Many Filipinos Around The World Are Making Full-Time Income ONLINE!***

As I smell the coffee brewing from my handy coffee press, I smell tomorrow as if I am huge, and indestructible. Remembering all the thoughts which made me stayed between being alive and being dead, I realize you really do not belong to me anymore, and that’s fine. Because this time, myself belongs to me.
As I drink the caffeine, slowly tasting its very taste, I tasted bitterness and sweetness which made me think that this is really what I need. Fusing two entities of positivity and negativity, and getting used to it as I try to get back on my feet.

This time, I woke up, and I just realized, I just got over you.
The dayI got over you….
…is the day I stopped thinking of our future together
…is the day I stopped hoping about us
…is the day I think of you without being hurt
…is the day I think of related things about you, but it doesn’t hurt anymore
…is the day I can think of things without thinking of you
…is the day I can think clearer about my future without you in it
…is the day I woke up, and I’m happy again

Above photo from Trinity Kubassek via pexels.com

CONTINUE READING: The Art of Moving On

Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

To Moving Forward

It’s been a while since my last post. Oh ‘a while’ would literally mean almost over a year. I’ve been swamped with school and work, and how my 2017 started with the death of my father really left me hanging there. I know and I’m sure it will take my whole life to accept it, and I really don’t know how to face my future without my best friend, my knight in shining armor–my father. Actually, I really don’t know how to be okay anymore.

From the day of my father’s passing, I really do not know how to pick up the pieces. I remembered my Mom, and my brother. They’re all I’ve got and I have all our lives to show them how I really love them; also, I have a loving boyfriend who stands by me all these years, and his family who loves us like their own. I am really thankful to all our friends and family (you know who you are, again, Thank You) who never left us during those times when we cannot see any light leading to a ‘tomorrow’.

This time, I want to start again with my blog with what keeps me going every single day. I’m that type of a person who writes her thoughts on a notebook/journal and actually re-read it after a while when nothing seems to be right anymore. Days passed, I found myself Google-ing motivational quotes to actually hit me through the face and keep me pumped up for at least the rest of the day. So everyday, without miss, I am actually reading quotes from Google to give me motivation for the whole day. At least, one day at a time.

Then I remembered, I have this blog, I think I could use some posts to actually use as my sounding board or receptacle to what I am going through right now.

As I write this entry, my heart is full of gratitude, especially to our Almighty God who is keeping us hopeful and who is giving us strength after all these endeavors.  I am nothing without Him, and I really won’t make it without God’s guidance.

From this day forward, I want to start sharing daily dose of motivation not just for the readers, but especially for me. At least, I want to be okay.

If you are still reading at this point, you might happen to be a close friend of mine or a person who knows me personally, or may be, someone who is also going through a rough time just like me. I hope you may find this useful.

I will start off with this quote,

“The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide you’re not going to stay where you are.” — John Pierpont Morgan

I just lost my hero, my father. But that doesn’t keep the fact that I still have another parent to love. I know that my Dad loved us so much, he did everything to give us a better life, and protected us from every possible pain we might ever encounter. I don’t know how to be okay, or how to accept this reality of not actually seeing my Dad when I go home, but I realized, maybe, God had him retire from this life because he had already completed his mission–that is to love us and dedicate his entire life giving us a comfortable life. My dad was the greatest hero I will ever have, I love him so much and I still think and dream about him.

My Dad is now resting in heaven. But my Mom is still with us, and I love her, too. She did everything to take care of my Dad until his last breath, and I am thankful because she never gave up. She guides us through the path of healing. I thank the Lord for having a tough Mom, and I want to show to her how much she means to me.

The quote says enough. The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide you’re not going to stay where you are. True enough. I don’t want to stay here and mourn about my father’s death, instead, I want to celebrate because I had a loving Dad who fought the toughest battles for his family. I want to remember my Dad laughing, fetching me from school or from the Hospital after my shift’s done, or being on a long ride, him being the driver which means I’ll have a pretty sound sleep, knowing that my Dad was driving the whole time. I want to remember him with that dimples on his cheeks when he smiles, and with his warm and reassuring hugs that everything will be alright. I want to remember his daily messages telling me to take care always–I mean literally, everyday he did that; or not to eat a lot of icecream because if I do, my throat might sore. I want to remember how I learned how to play the guitar when I was 13 because, hell yeah he was some kind of a pro every time he strung that guitar; or how I learned to drive a manually driven car because he told me, only a few girls can drive a manually operated car and he said, he would be so proud if I am one of those few genius ladies who can blend the clutch and the gas pedals while driving on a hill. I want to remember his faith and trust on me. He was the first person who believed in me, who wrote my first dreams, who made me feel like I can always be better, and I am worthy of being someone.

I know that I will never see his face anymore, but I know he is just around watching us from above.

Thank you so much, Pa, for everything. I promise, not to stay like this. I promise to move forward, and continue all the dreams you have for me. I promise we will take care of Mama. I love you so much, Pa. Sending all my love to you in heaven.
From Your Only Daughter,  Kim

Above photo from pexels.com

***ADS HERE: IGNORE THIS ADS IF NOT INTERESTED***

Bakit Maraming Filipino Ang Naghihirap At Paano Mo Makokopya Ang Mga Milyonaryong Filipino? FIND OUT HERE

***ADS HERE: IGNORE THIS ADS IF NOT INTERESTED***