Old Ways Won’t Open New Doors: 2018 GOALS

Last year, on my birthday, I started to make my own list of “new” year’s resolution to guide me through another year of my life, somehow, I realized that things which you are really committed to do won’t take a short time to happen or manifest in your life, so I kind of reviewed my birthday resolution list and make them into my new year’s resolution.

Another year has passed again, and as we come to realize that we are not “getting any younger,” we start to ask ourselves questions like, “what happened to you?” “Have you accomplished your goals?” Did you enjoy your 20’s? Have you had a productive 2017?”  Actually, I have mixed emotions regarding the new year. Nevertheless, 

I realized it isn’t too late to start all over again. Years from now when I look back, I want to remember this day when finally I realized I should give priority to improving myself, and how I could be of help to others, or at least not to be other’s baggage.

This year, I want to free myself of hate or of negativities. Life is too short to keep grudge or to argue with someone, or to be impatient. Life should be fun, and should be full of enthusiasm.

2018 Goals:



**Good relationship with Mom

Ever since I was a kid, I’ve been super close to my Dad, but when my Dad passed away, even though I haven’t come to my full recovery, yet, I realized I still have one parent, equally deserving of my love and attention, who is my Mom. I think everybody should have a good relationship with their Moms. She is the one who brought you into this world. Thanks to her this world will never be the same again because of a bright and awesome person she delivered when you were born. Don’t let the day pass without calling her or making sure if she’s ok. Ok?

Dear Mom, I love you.

 

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**Good relationship with the Sib

Your siblings are your own flesh and blood, you shouldn’t argue with them long before you knew you passed their birthday without greeting them or without making them feel loved. Their failures are yours, too, so make sure you exist in their lives no matter how difficult it is to call from abroad to know if they’re doing well, or ask if they’ve visited your folks already this month.

**Unwavering Faith

When you get to be on your own, you’ll realize the Divine Intervention guiding you through every step. At times you may feel that you are alone, but thanks to the Lord, He has never left us. There are times, all you can say is, “It’s You and  me again, God! Please take care of me and never leave my side.” That’s the time you’ll know you have strengthen your faith ever.

Read More: 7 Things I Want To Give Up This Year

** Long-lasting friendships

You may have all drifted apart, some got married and some have kids, some went to work abroad, some may remained busy in school to pursue their postgrad studies, but no matter how many times your priorities change, wherever life takes you, if a person is opt to be in your life, they will remain. You will find ways to reach each other or to get connected. You might be miles apart but your love and care for each other never change. You know you’ve lost some people along the way, some might be your best friends, but those who remained despite of it all, are your true friends. Keep them wherever you’ll go.


**Healthy Habits

Admit it or not, you are not getting any younger. It’s better to think ahead about your health, because let me say it, health is wealth. True enough, prevention is better than cure. As early as your mid20’s you should already be taking care of your health. You should start to plan healthy activities like 30min jogging or brisk walking at least twice a week; or to eat those vegetables which you’ve been avoiding since you were a kid… It’s up to you, as long as you know that chips in the morning, chips in the afternoon, and chips for dinner is in fact, unhealthy. Remember, you don’t want that your savings will go to your medication in the future just because you were taking your health for granted right now.

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**Peaceful coexistence with seemingly not-so-kind people

You can’t please everybody, you know that. So better accept that. No matter how you crash with someone, because of their personality, or bad deeds, you should learn to let small things go. Life should be spent being happy, not being angry to someone nor gossiping about them, either. It isn’t worth your precious time after all so keep that mouth shut and replace it with a smile. Science proves that silence and a genuine smile reduce fight significantly than confrontation. Remember to choose your battles.



**Profitable Hobby

Don’t get me wrong when I say, “profitable.” What I mean is beneficial or adds value to your life or to your own improvement. It’s okay if you are a KPop fan, but you know that there’s a thin line between admiration and addiction—you know it’s too much if you see yourself lying on your couch or wallowing on your bed with your favorite series on, without washing last night’s dishes, or haven’t even washed your 2week old might-have-been-rotting-already laundry. Before you know it, even your social life will suffer. I know, because I’ve been there. LOL




**Saving for the future, and thinking about your retirement

Yes as early as now. The best time to save money is when you have some. I couldn’t agree more! This is the right time to save for your future, and even think about your retirement plans. When you talk about investment, they say, the name of the game is time. You have to make money out of time just like what you are doing during employment. They exchange money for their hours of work (guilty!). Start now or forever regret in silence! The name of the game is time!

I make myself rich by making my wants few. Henry David Thoreau

**The Art of Deadma

Don’t sweat the small things. I’ll say it again, life is short. Your life is passing by before your eyes but you’re busy worrying about what your workmate forgot to do (which she must’ve supposed to do during her shift) which made you do it because her shift has ended, and you were to change her. OhMy. This is too much. God gives us an opportunity to give our best or to see the beautiful things He made for us to discover everyday. When you feel you will get mad, count from 1-10 and take 3 deep breaths, and move on. Give people benefit of the doubt, and forgive them. Remember everyone has been hurt, has lost something, or has been disappointed, not just you. Let go and let God, forgive people and your load will be lighter, I promise.



FINAL THOUGHTS 
If you are reading this, you might be someone who likes to read stuff on how to improve themselves, who is from their 20’s or someone who comes from the 30’s group who wants to assess themselves, if you really got it great before you turned 30. Whoever you are, whatever you do, remember, LIFE IS SHORT. Be forgiving, loving, generous, and understanding. Every person is fighting a battle you know nothing about so better be kind to every soul you meet. Not everything is centerred to you. The earth doesn’t revolve around your own axis, and remember that the place where your rights stop, the rights of others start.

Before you act, listen.

Before you react, think,

Before you spend, earn.

Before you criticize, wait.

Before you pray, forgive.

Before you quit, try.

-Ernest Hemingway

Read More: 10+ Signs You’ve Become a Better Version of Yourself

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7 Life Hacks I’ve Learned From My Soldier

A part of being with someone means learning their ways or adapting their own thinking and somehow, without intention, you tend to apply it in your own day-to-day life.

I’ve been in a relationship with an MIU (man in uniform: then-Cadet/Soldier) for almost 8 years, and I can say, a lot of his own “ideals” in life, I tend to actually adapt into my own life.

He is a Soldier, generally, we could conclude that he should be protective and strict, yes protective, and a little bit strict at times, and since we are soon to build a family of our own–a Military Family at that, he tends to be so heedful about the values we cultivate as a couple.

Since Day 1, he has been very “extra protective” of me because he knows how naive I am, how impulsive I am to making harsh decisions, and how I easily slip things on my hands, unintentionally.

So through time, I’ve learned these things from him, important values I think I could share to you, and I hope it will help you, too.

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Life Hacks I’ve Learned From My Soldier

NEVER VOLUNTEER INFORMATION

He is a Soldier, as much as I’d like to deny this fact, we will be having “extra special” kind of family in the future, where “extra” means we have to be very vigilant and careful because, bad guys do exist. If you know where I’m getting into, you know how important this really is. So I cannot barge around meeting new people and tell them my boyfriend is a Soldier, and he is currently assigned to this and that, etc, etc, our home address, where his parents’ home is, etc etc. FACT: I actually don’t carry any military-related stuff, his photo wearing his rank, or PMA souvenir, takot ko lang. Civis lang lagi dapat ang peg.

NEVER TELL PEOPLE YOUR WHEREABOUTS

First clue: He deactivated navi tools in our devices; and when I’m with him, we tend to keep ourselves being tracked by the social media, and stuff. I know sometimes it’s kind of overacting because who cares where we are after all, right? We are not celebrities, or VIPs, but he explained to me that he is a government property; he is a walking hot stuff with “barcode” ready to be snatched by some dude trying to ruin the democracy or so. LOL. Kidding aside, I should really give this some serious consideration, because I know he has Serial Number, and he is more important as I think he is, especially to the government.

So yeah, majority of our photos are “throwback” or “days ago” photos, and I’ve gotten used to it.

Read More: Military Relationship Facts

MASTER SELF-PRESERVATION

“No matter where you are, always be at peace with everybody. Don’t take sides, be neutral. Don’t open your mouth if you have any opinion about someone’s life, it’s not your business. Behave properly.” These are just his common precautions which he reminds me on a regular basis.

You know, I’m an INTJ type of person,  so I tend to be analytical all the time.

INTJ PERSONALITY: Rules, limitations and traditions are anathema to the INTJ personality type – everything should be open to questioning and reevaluation, and if they see a way, INTJs will often act unilaterally to enact their technically superior, sometimes insensitive, and almost always unorthodox methods and ideas. ~MBTI

(Take the “MBTI” Test to find out which personality type you belong, and share your results, I want to know!)

I tend to be critical about things, and I don’t settle for less. This is my then-personality and it has mellowed down as my BF tamed me through the years.

DO NOT OPEN YOUR MOUTH if you will only say bad stuff or suggestive comments to people who are not your people, haha MAPAPAAWAY KA LANG. Yes, I’ve learned a lot from this.

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ENVIRONMENTAL AWARENESS

When we go to a totally new place, esp buildings for that matter, I always find him looking for the “EMERGENCY EXIT.” He is very vigilant this way. Later on in life, I realized I’m becoming him. You know, we are a typical LDR couple so majority of my time I spend alone, and these “life skills” of his tend to creep through my veins before my own eyes. Haha I was actually taking serious precautions that my co-workers find me a little bit weird already. Haha

Read More: How My Soldier BF Got Over His Loneliness After I Went Abroad

SAFETY FIRST

Yes, whatever happens, choose the greater good for a greater number. hehe Basic Life Support 101. Kidding aside, you have to really prioritze safety. It’s better safe than sorry, sabi nga nila.

SAVE

I’m the type of person before who loves to YOLO. I spend my hard-earned money to unnecessary things, buying stuff I actully don’t need. Here comes Sancho, a spendthrift person, who saves and invests regularly. Even before he graduates from the Academy, he has already estbalished this habit, which now, I am currently applying because of his influence. LOL Remember this: save now, and it will save you in the future.

“The simple fact that is hard to learn is that the time to save money is when you have some.”

LOVE & TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF

Actually, this might sound a little bit funny, or “not-so-serious” item on the list, but hey! It’s actually vital. I was reading last month, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, and I was actually planning to re-read it again, and on the early pages, I remember, author Stephen Covey explains that in order to “produce” you have to actually invest on the “production capability” or the P/PC Balance Principle.

Aesop’s fable of the Goose and the Golden Egg TM

This fable is the story of a poor farmer who one day discovers in the nest of his pet goose a glittering golden egg. At first, he thinks it must be some kind of trick. But as he starts to throw the egg aside, he has second thoughts and takes it in to be appraised instead. The egg is pure gold! The farmer can’t believe his good fortune. He becomes even more incredulous the following day when the experience is repeated. Day after day, he awakens to rush to the nest and find another golden egg. He becomes fabulously wealthy; it all seems too good to be true.

But with his increasing wealth comes greed and impatience. Unable to wait day after day for the golden eggs, the farmer decides he will kill the goose and get them all at once. But when he opens the goose, he finds it empty. There are no golden eggs — and now there is no way to get any more. The farmer has destroyed the goose that produced them.

But as the story shows, true effectiveness is a function of two things: what is produced (the golden eggs) and the producing asset or capacity to produce (the goose).

source: EFECTIVENESS DEFINED by Stephen R. Covey

Sancho always tells me this, “My, katawan lang natin ang puhunan natin sa trabaho, kaya dapat alagaan natin ang sarili natin.” He always reminds me to take my vitamins regularly, sleep early, stay warm, eat healthy, exercise reguarly and stuff, and actually he reminds me to update my “work stuff” regularly, especially my shoes or work clothes, because these things are the ones which I use everyday during work, so it has to be extra durable and could actually prevent incidents of injury, ie the shoes/car/ride that we use everyday. You know.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Yes, I know sometimes we’re kind of over doing stuff, but actually if you come to think of it, we should really be extra careful because we are inside the Military. We are not just civilians who snap around trying to challenge freedom; we are a part of the organization who actually maintain and uphold the peace and order for others to actually enjoy their “freedom,” and by this, we should at least, try not contribute to the problem, and do our best to at least help our MIU uphold their ideals by being vigilant in our own little ways.

Notes: Sancho is a Junior Officer of the Philippine Army, I, on the other hand is an ordinary girl from an ordinary family, trying to love an extraordinary man 🙂

Military Relationship is tough, but if you belong to us, like the PAGE for more “extraordinary” articles to read. See you soon! ~KimSancho

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The list goes on! What life hacks have you learned from your Soldier? Tell us your stories by commenting on this article.

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5 Reasons You Should Do Your Best Today

Push yourself because no one else is going to do it for you.
This blog entry is inspired by my niece, Anne, who is now  a 3rd year Chemical Engineering student. She told me she’s been unmotivated for quite some time now, because of unrequited effort she is constantly having from all her engineering subjects, and for all those humdrum of college spectacles.

5 Reasons You Should Do Your Best Today

1. Remember why you started.

Life consists of sacrifices, and you got to take one for the team. Think of the most important people in your life, your parents, or your siblings perhaps; they’ve already took sacrifices for you, and this time, you got to take one for them, too.

Not satisfied, yet? Ok, think of your dreams. A couple of months or semesters ago, you’ve entered the school/university with the hope of becoming the best insert your future course/ occupation/ position in your humble town from your very own province. What happened now? Do you still want to be an Engineer? A Nurse? A Teacher? A Professional? An Entrepreneur? Or do you want to forgo this dream because you can’t take the fact that you only got 2-3 hours of sleep everyday due to school requirements? Mind the rewarding outcome, not the temporary comfort.

2. You’ve gone so far, don’t give up.

You’ve already hurdled great amount of effort before, why do you still want to give up now? A couple of months/years from now you will become the Boss reaping all successes which you got from your past sacrifices. The only requirement you need to do is to get yourself back on track and try to hold it together. It’s okay to set back once in a while, but you gotta make sure you’ll be back quickly to hold it together, again, this time, fiercer.

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Read More: 4 Habits Successful People Have

3. When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.

Remember, the harder, the better. In the future, you will not only encounter hills of problems, but mountains of them. So as you train to becoming the Boss, or the ‘Ma’am’ in your dream job/work/eterprise in the near future, it is necessary that you train in the worsts experiences and situations. You can’t be that good in your craft if you haven’t gone through the worsts.

A diamond is just a piece of charcoal that handled stress exceptionally well.

4. Look up to your seniors.

You sure have someone you look up to who has already reached the zenith or the acme of your career. Don’t forget them during your battles, because they are impeccable proof who manifest that someone got off from your situation alive, and successful.

Read More: 10+ Signs You’ve Become A Better Version Of Yourself

5. Don’t forget that, “This too shall pass.”

Time is gold. This is classic, but I’m 100percent sure you do not want to get through this all over again, right? So do your best today. Screw later, because LATER is for people who want to set aside their future. They want to let the wind tell them where to go, and you don’t want that—a future full of uncertainties. What happens today dictates your future. Whatever you are doing today is creating your subsequent plans so make the best out of NOW.
Do something today, that your future self will thank you for.

Remember, it PAYS to be a WINNER.

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“Keep your head up. God gives His hardest battles to His strongest soldiers.” -Katie Schubert

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Read More: 24 Ways to Cast That Stress Away!

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4 Habits Successful People Have

“Successful people never ask if things will work. They are willing to try and find out.” -Brad Gosse

4 Habits Successful People Have

Open-Minded

A narrow-headed person always creates petty fights everywhere he goes, because he never listens. Successful people actually listen a lot, in fact, their words are always few, they tend to  be the listener most of the time, because they want to get innovative ideas from other people .
Don’t be too skeptic or doubtful, and carefully weigh your words before you throw them, because you won’t get any wiser if you always choose to be the talker, remember, your ears are two compared to your only one mouth.  So remember to listen twice as much as you speak.

Be curious, not judgmental. -W. Whitman

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Risk-taker

You know that uncertain paths might lead to wasteful end or regretful mistakes. However, when you won’t choose to take weighed risks, you will never go anywhere, and you can never change where you are, obviously. Studies show that elderly people regret most of what they didn’t do than what they actually did even if it went shoddily. So take risks. You only live once. Make the best of it. Life consists of numerous trials and errors.

The real risk is doing nothing.

Positive

Nobody has a positive life with a negative mind. True enough, you know a good and successful person if that person always bless. His words are full of positive thoughts, encouragement, and motivation, and whenever he speaks, you just want to jump off from there, and run back to your life, and try to fix it and start all over again. That’s the effect of a truly successful person. Successful people are eager to teach someone to be successful, too.
Positivity is a choice. Like happiness, it cannot be found outside us, but within us lies positivity. Remember to be like the protons, ALWAYS POSITIVE. 🙂

I will go anywhere as long as it is forward. David Livingston

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Choose SUCCESS over EXCUSES

Robert Kiyosaki once said, “If you wan’t to be rich, don’t allow yourself the luxury of excuses.” True enough, every time we decide to start something we really wanted to do, like pursuing our post-grad education, or even the most ordinary deed like house chores, there will always be something blocking us from doing it, right? And we allow it, habitually. Like, “later if my kid gets 2, or later if I’m done watching insert the name of your favorite show.”

You can have RESULTS or EXCUSES. Not both.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Admit it or not, you always choose the luxury of excuses because there lies your ‘comfort zone’ where everything is good and easy. If you want to draw the line from becoming good to becoming great, help yourself. Remember, the harder, the better.

“When you want to SUCCEED as much as you want to BREATHE, then you’ll be SUCCESSFUL.” -Eric Thomas

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24 Ways To Cast That Stress Away!

So this is according to WebMD on their article Stress Symptoms

What Is Stress?

Stress is the body’s reaction to harmful situations — whether they’re real or perceived. When you feel threatened, a chemical reaction occurs in your body that allows you to act in a way to prevent injury. This reaction is known as “fight-or-flight,” or the stress response. During stress response, your heart rate increases, breathing quickens, muscles tighten, and blood pressure rises. You’ve gotten ready to act. It is how you protect yourself.

Stress means different things to different people. What causes stress in one person may be of little concern to another. Some people are better able to handle stress than others. And, not all stress is bad. In small doses, stress can help you accomplish tasks and prevent you from getting hurt. For example, stress is what gets you to slam on the breaks to avoid hitting the car in front of you. That’s a good thing.

Our bodies are designed to handle small doses of stress. But, we are not equipped to handle long-term, chronic stress without ill consequences.

-from Stress Symptoms,WebMD

*******PMG NOTES********

“Tough times don’t last, tough people do.”

Remember, it’s not the weight that puts you down, it’s the way you carry it. So here are some ways to bust the stress away. I hope you’ll find it useful. 🙂

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24 Effective Stress Busters

1. Just let it out. Shout it out loud like no one’s watching.
2. Eat it out. Just this once.
3. Listen to music.
4. Break your habit just for one day.
5. Have a relaxing bath
6. Light that candle. Explore those aroma varieties!
7. Take a walk.
8. Have a foot spa.
9. Keep a diary.
10. Sleep.
11. Make your own 3-year calendar and put those important dates in it especially your love ones’ birthdates!
12. Befriend yourself, and learn to chill.
13. Watch a movie.
14. Talk to a friend or two.
15. Go shopping.
16. Draw or paint.
17. Cook your favorite meal!
18. Take a selfie with a wide grin.
19. Start a scrap book or a photo album.
20. Have a cup of coffee.
21. Do sports.
22. Sing!
23. Jog.
24. Laugh!

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Next time you’re stressed:
Take a step back, inhale and laugh. Remember who you are and why you’re here. You’re never given anything in this world that you can’t handle. Be strong, be flexible, love yourself, and love others. Always just keep moving forward. ~unknown source

FINAL THOUGHTS:

When you’re stressed, remember to stop for a while and at least let your mind goes where it wants to.. just drift away… and then finally.. when you find your focus, go back to the battle. But remember that it’s always nice to take a step back once in a while, it will make you see things clearly, and do things wiser.  Good luck!

The list goes on! What do you do when you’re stressed? Tell us, so we can help others, too!

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10+ Signs You’ve Become a Better Version of Yourself

“The safest principle through Life, instead of reforming others, is to set about PERFECTING YOURSELF.” -B. R. Haydon

There are times in your life when you stop for a while and you try to assess yourself. Have you become better after all these years? Comparing to the “Past You,” do you think you have improved? Have you become the person you dream to be?
Self-evaluation from time to time will help us get ahead from our older selves and keep us in line with our goals and aspirations. So here is a check list to help us appraise ourselves.

ACCEPTING CRITICISMS POSITIVELY

Remember the time when a certain Teacher back in school tried to correct you and yet you didn’t actually listen because you think she was just mocking you in class? I once taught to students before, and it dawned on me that the only reason why teachers check their students is because they want them to be correct, nothing else.
This time is different. Now you think healthy criticisms will make you better and will help you improve your skills in your career. That’s why, you accept them whole heartedly and happily even if sometimes it crushes your bones.

LOOKING DOWN ON A PERSON ONLY WHEN YOU ARE TRYING TO HELP THEM

“We rise by lifting others.”

When we were younger, social status was so important to us that at least once, we tried choosing our friends from the status they’re in (especially during grade school). As you mature, social status doesn’t matter to you at all. The only time you look down on someone is when you are trying to pull them up; to get in their shoes to better understand them. You only think the best way to help them is to know where they were coming from and try to start from there.

BECOMING EVEN CLOSER TO THE CREATOR

Right now, you believe the indispensable truth that there is a Creator of everything you see in the world. You perfectly know that without His guidance, you will not be able to get by even in a single day or two. You believe that wherever you are and whatever you are doing, you know that He is with you at all times keeping you safe and guiding you through the perfect path He prepared for you.

NOT MINDING OTHER’S OPINION OF YOUR CHOICES IN LIFE

I can’t tell tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone. Ed Sheeran

Now that you have grown maturely, opinion of other people doesn’t matter to you at all especially when you are making your own decisions. Only yours and your love ones’ opinion matter now. That being said, you realize that people will always talk behind your back even when things are done or not. So you just mind your own business instead, and focus your target straight through your goals with a bull’s eye.

TAKING CONTROL OF YOUR OWN MONEY

“The goal isn’t more money. The goal is living life on your terms.”

Now that you know how hard money is earned, you are not easily get carried away when you see a SALE sign posted on the walls of your favorite stores. You prioritise the need to meet your own necessities first, and thinking of saving a bigger amount, before cashing out money to buy your dream Chanel or Fendi bag or that MK watch you kept on seeing since last month. Compared to the past you, right now, you know how important money is and how a single refusal from your “wants” can move mountains if you put it in a good investment. Now you’re thinking of investing some amount of money for the future and you’re also considering long-term goals, even excited about joining retirement plans.

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CELEBRATING YOUR FAMILY’S UNIQUENESS

Before, when you see a happy, well-heeled family, you know from your heart you also want your family to be like that, and you get so envy you over compared your own family’s capability of providing for your needs. But this time is different, you realise the value of your family and you are proud of every effort they make. Now you know how different families are, and you know that no amount of money can buy your own family’s concord. You also know that whatever it is you are doing right now, it is because you have an ultimate goal for your family to jubilate later on.

ENJOYING THE COMPANY OF YOUR OWN SELF

KEEP CALM CAUSE I LOVE TO BE ALONE

Right now, “Me” time is no fuss to you. You even enjoy going to the mall alone, or walking leisurely in the park, or even traveling alone. You don’t have any problem going solo because you have turned into an independent, self-supporting person that you are right now.

TREASURING YOUR OLD FRIENDS & TAKING CARE OF NEW ONES

It takes time and some amount of hurdled hills to know who your real friends are. Luckily, you have your own friends and true enough, you have let time decide whether who’s staying or not. You know how important some minutes of Skype calls compared to long hours of chitchats when you were together. Even if you don’t talk constantly, and you are miles apart, you know from your heart that your friendship has gone through hard times that no amount of distance can separate you.

BEING OPEN-MINDED

Open our mind before your mouth.

Right now you believe that the world is changing so fast that almost everyday a breakthrough is being invented. What has been true before, might not be true today. So you become more adaptive to situations right now and you are open to sudden changes. You believe that even if others’ thoughts are not the same with yours, you know how important it is knowing that they have their own intellectuality and you respect it.

MEETING NEW PEOPLE DOESN’T SCARE YOU

Good things happen when you meet strangers

Self-contentment is a thing majority of people believe will help them succeed, but actually, nobody realizes their goals unless they conspire with others. Hence, you know how important it is to become socially active. This time, meeting people is a pleasure. You get more interested by their own stories, rather than bragging about yourself. And when you see them again, you do not remember them by the clothes they were wearing that night but by the depth of conversation you had.

PRIORITIZING OTHERS & LEARNING HOW TO COMPROMISE

Compromise need not mean cowardice.

When you were younger, you believe that the only person you have to satisfy is yourself. So you were selfish and everything you did was for your own sake. This time, you know how important others are  as  you are, so you learn how to compromise. By this, you got kinder and more generous to other people. You know that you will not always get what you want because others should be placed first before yourself.
Asking yourself “what’s in it for me?” doesn’t matter sometimes because you believe that others have needs, too, so you deny yourself of your wants and needs.. Hence, you became more self-less and compassionate.

ASKING MORE QUESTIONS

Don’t be afraid of the answers, be afraid of not asking the questions. -Jennifer Hudson

I remember my classmate in language class, when he tried to belittle me because I kept asking questions. Later on I think he got his doom when he didn’t actually pass a certain exam. Asking questions will not be a matter of life and death to you right now because you know perfectly that asking questions doesn’t make you less of a person. You do not want to commit mistakes later on so you are just being proactive.

TAKING RESPONSIBILITY

When you choose your behavior, you choose your consequences. -Dr. Phil

You know very well that what you are doing right now will greatly dictate what you will become in the future. So even the slightest detail in your work or a big decision to make matter to you. You know that you are responsible for your own actions and words so you become more careful with what you do and say.

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NOT LIVING IN THE PAST

Here’s to the future because I’m done with the past.

Some of us think that we have already moved on from the past, however, little did we know that a small glimpse from the past, frequently thought of everyday means we are still living there. Now, try to reminisce, when was the last time you had a great achievement? Was it when you got your college diploma? Or just recently when you got a promotion? Or the other day when you dined out with your family? Whatever it is that we think is important to us, however big or small, matters. However, when we look back and think that the past is better than today, well, maybe you have to re-evaluate yourself.

FINAL THOUGHTS: Being better than we were before entails a lifetime commitment. It is not a pill which we can take tonight and hola! tomorrow we transform. No. It takes time to learn and change for the better, but one thing is for sure, it will all start from a DECISION.

 

Above photo from rawpixel.com via pexels.com

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11 Life Lessons From A Soldier’s Perspective

As I read the entries, I realized, marami pa akong hindi alam sa buhay, I should really ponder on these things and actually discern kung nagagawa ko bang maging mabuti, to outgrow my immaturity and to become a better version of myself. Be positive! Fight! Fight!

This is an article contributed by a close friend of mine who happens to be a Junior Officer in the Philippine Army.

Read On:

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1. Respect and love your parents

Kasi mga magulang mo sila kahit na anong mangyari. Cherish every moment with them.

2. Make good and unforgettable memories with your siblings

Ang mga kapatid, walang kapalit din yan..I n short, mahalaga talaga ang foundation ng family.

3. Pagdating sa friends, habang tumatanda tayo, real friends will remain

Iba ang friends sa magkakilala lang.

4. Learning never stops

Dapat as early as now, pinapahalagahan mo na ang mga natutunan mo. Para pagdating ng panahon, mai-apply mo nang tama.. Also, as we grow old, maiisip natin na lahat ng mga nangyayari sa atin, may lessons learned iyan.

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5. A good heart will never fade

Attitude matters talaga.. Pwedeng mag-fade away ang physical beauty, pero ang ugali ng isang tao, hndi makakalimutan.. Masama man or mabuti, diyan ka maaalala.. sa ugali mo..

6. Simplicity is beauty

Minsan maisip mo na okay rin pala kahit simple ka lang. Nasa confidence mo iyan. Makikita mo kasi ang beauty ng tao kapag wala siyang kahit na anong gamit or suot, through her smile , or through her eyes.. Ganun lang..

7. Life is simple

Do not over-stress yourself. Hindi mo naman kailangan patulan lahat ng issues na naririnig mo. Malulungkot ka lang. Kung hindi naman big deal, huwag ka dapat maging affected.

8. Be humble

Kung talagang may pagkakamali ka, embrace it and learn to say sorry. Be humble. Tao lang tayo, walang perfect sa atin. Lahat may mga failures and pagkakamali.

9. Gaano man kahirap or kasakit ang dinaranas mong mga problema, tuloy pa rin ang buhay

Depende lang iyan kung paano ka lumaban and paano mo i-handle ang mga problema mo.. Okay lang umiyak.. Ilabas mo lang. Ang importante fighting ka pa rin. Sabi nga doon sa Dont quit, REST IF YOU MUST BUT DONT YOU QUIT.

10.

Kahit gaano man kataas ang mga pangarap natin and kahit gaano man kalayo ang mga narating natin sa buhay, babalik and babalik tayo sa simpleng buhay kasama ang family natin. Time will come na masaya na tayo sa isang scenic view, drinking coffee.. Iyong tipong marealize mo na at least nakaya mo ang lahat.. Simple lang.. Pero masaya.

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11. Self-love is important

Self-love includes self respect and self-esteem.. Kasi kung darating sa point na mararamdaman mong wala nang ngmamahal sayo, at least maisip mo na mahal mo pala ang sarili mo. Kapag nakita ng ibang tao na you have self-respect, they will also respect you.. and tsaka mo lang masasabing kaya mo nang magmahal ng iba kapag you have already given enough love for yourself.. walang ibang magmamahal sayo kundi sarili mo lang din.

Topmost photo is a derivative of an original photo taken from Pineapple Supply Co. via pexels.com

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“God’s Time is Always Perfect” -Sai N.

This is a post in response to the recently posted article, “IMMEDIATELY: This Word I Wouldn’t Want To Hear Before”

I was actually ranting about my thoughts once again, about my dearly beloved Soldier, and how we managed to stay steadfast for more than 7 years, yet, still not deciding to tie the knot. (This is of course before The Proposal happened).

I’ve realized a lot when one of our readers responded to this rant post of mine LOL, it came to me that I have all I need in the world because I have him, and to really entrust my faith in God in order to conquer my doubts for myself, and fears for the future.

After you have read the article, “IMMEDIATELY: This Word I Wouldn’t Want To Hear Before” please read the following advice from Miss Sai, this is worth a read, everyone.

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In reply to this post:
IMMEDIATELY: This Word I Wouldn’t Want To Hear Before

(Ayaw ko na i-comment dun, masyadong mahaba eh.)

I read it, from the start to the very end. Let me tell you a short story before giving you an advice

My husband, then a Cadet was sent out from the Academy for some reasons. Na-turn back siya and he is waiting for a letter from PMA para makabalik siya. That is when we meet each other again.

Naging kami, then he asked me to marry him. That time he was working in a company with a good salary, may trabaho din ako. So parang financially stable naman kami. I prayed and asked God, is it the right time? I trust in Your perfect timing. Just a few days after that, he received a letter from PMA. I told myself, hindi pa right time ni Ama and I told him, go reach for your dreams. I will be here patiently waiting for you.

During the time that he was inside the Academy, I busied myself working because I have to pay for my sibling’s education. I also wanted to take master’s degree and also be a lawyer. But due to financial reasons, anak lang kami ng “Mess Kit” (a term they refer to children of ordinary soldiers or enlisted personnel) I have to he set aside my dreams to give way to my siblings.

Read Related Article from Kim&Sai: Love Letter From A Cadet

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Fast forward, he graduated from the academy. He again, asked me na mag-immediately na, I declined. I told him to spend time with his family and focus on his career and his dreams of becoming a pilot. I told him I’ll decide after he graduates from Military Pilot Training.

Just as he was about to graduate from MPT, my sister is also graduating from college and I am so happy that at last I could now spend my earnings to get a law degree. A week before his graduation, he again asked me to marry him. I told him my take on the situation. He took me to the nearest church, told me let’s pray for this. And on the night of his graduation he told me this: “Alam ko marami ka pang pangarap. Marami kang gustong marating. Pero gusto ko kasama mo ako sa pagtupad ng mga pangarap mo. Ayoko na wala ako sa tabi mo kapag masaya ka, malungkot ka… gusto kong bumawi. Wala ako nung grumaduate ka ng college, wala ako nung unang sweldo mo, wala ako nung ma-promote ka… gusto ko this time kapag naging abogado ka, nasa tabi mo ako. Gusto ko habang inaabot mo ang pangarap mo hawak mo ang kamay ko.” Hearing those words made my heart melt and told myself, man! This man really loves me. That’s the moment I said yes.

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Now my advise:

1. This is the most important of all, ask God for his perfect time. God’s time is never late nor early, it is always perfect.

2. Natatakot ka na baka you’re not good enough for him… no honey. You are the one for him. He chose you from among all the women he met. And always remember, you are to be his wife. Your goal is to be with him forever and support him, you are not just an “Ayer’s wife” you are his wife. Sinabi ko noon sa asawa ko, ayokong maging asawa ng opisyal. I married you beacuse I want to be your wife, not an officer’s wife. Kung naging sarhento ka lang or security guard, I would still marry you.

That’s it. Just pray and ask for God’s help and for sure everything will fall on its right place.

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PMG NOTES: You know what, after reading this again, I actually felt enlightened, and I actually felt I am adequately capable to be my man’s future wife. Once again, thank you Miss Sai for your unending support, I know you are very busy pursuing your Law Degree, but you still manage to read my stories. Special mention to Sir Arkim, welcome to PMG! Thank you for reading the stories, grabe Sir, you are simply the best, sobrang nakakakilig ang Proposal mo. To God be all the Glory!

Above photo from the couple themselves, Ms Sai and Sir Kim Nalang on their Wedding Day

Read Related Article from Kim&Sai: Love Letter From A Cadet

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10 Relationship Vitals Every Couple Should Know

“I WANT US TO LAST. I don’t want to have an amazing couple of months and then it be all over in a flash. I don’t want to experience the feelings of hurt, confusion, and disappointment again. No matter what we run into & no matter how hard things get, I WANT US TO STICK TOGETHER.” -Anonymous

1. Know the real essence of PRIVACY, and apply it.

Remember: Relationships last longer when nobody knows your business. So try to keep your ‘moments’ just between the two of you. It’s fine to post photos of you during an important event of your life because it’s a milestone, but too much posting of your photos and overly lovey dovey status updates actually won’t help your relationship. Not everything in your life is “postable” in your social media. Take note, it’s not the public’s relationship but yours. Also, when you fight, nobody else has to know. You don’t need to let anyone see your dirty laundry out of the bucket. So be careful.

image source

2. Keeping Notes

Everything that’s happening in your life as a couple is a milestone. So it’s important you should document! It maybe cheesy for others to see if you are always capturing photos of you together, but that’s fine. It won’t hurt anyone, unless of course you post everything on Facebook! LOL. Take a lot of photos, and keep them in your files, later on, at least you have memories to reminisce as you move past your younger years together, as a couple. Own a camera and an external hard drive just for your photos together. Be creative, too, by compiling them in a scrap book or photo albums, or even mural of your photos together!

3. Do Not Rush!

Again, whether you’ve heard this before for the nth time, I’d still say, TIMING IS EVERYTHING. Not everything should be done shotgun or unplanned. Although majority would attest that things which happened spontaneously last, this is true, but it may not be the same with others. Love is not about sky diving, where you start at the top, and rush to the ground, it’s all about a step by step process which entails trial and error. At first it may get exciting, but there are certain days when you will find yourself in anguish. So that’s when the ‘DO NOT RUSH’ reminder comes in. Again, before you jump in a new commitment, assess yourself, are you really prepared for the roller coaster ride you are going to experience in a yet another relationship? If you answer this question and have thought of other significant priorities, I guess, you’re not ready yet, and chances are you will end up frustrated once you choose to enter a relationship, and you’re also responsible with the other person’s misery, too.

image source

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4. Crossing the line

Everything Done Horizontally Is Dangerous! If you know you are already a mature individual who could take the pressure and effects of premarital lovemaking, then fine, it’s nobody’s business. But if you are someone who preserves this for the love of her life (is there anyone who still believes in this?), then you might not want to cross the line. Remember that majority of the things you do horizontally, are the ones you cannot take back. In short, these things are irreversible. If you’re not ready, then don’t do it. TRUE LOVE WAITS.

image source

5. Public Display of Affection

About PDA. Public Display of Affection is not necessary for couples who respect themselves and who maintain the respect of the public towards them. Don’t wait until someone will say, “Get a room, already!” It’s alright to let others know she’s your girlfriend by holding her hand while walking, but it’s very unattractive to see if you are already kissing up to your throats in front of the mass. How about the children? How about your parents? C’mon, get some values. Sooner or later, you will be parents, too, and you won’t want to see this in your children, either.

6. Meeting The Parents

Of course, one of the most momentous beacons your relationship could ever hurdle is meeting each other’s parents and relatives. It could cause you a bit of anxiety, but believe me, they are also nervous to meet you. Remember, just relax and be yourself. If you are a woman who isn’t fond of wearing mountain-high heels, then don’t. If you’re a woman who doesn’t wear makeup, then that’s fine. Just be your comfortable self. Take note of this: your partner’s parents are also ordinary individuals (like you) who are only trying to be parents. Get to know them according to their own individuality and uniqueness, and surely, you will capture their hearts.

7. Meeting The Gang

Relax, it’s just the gang! LOL. But actually, this is even more of a nerve-wracking experience you could ever get yourself into. However, you do not have to impress anyone just to turn them into your side or get their favor. Again, just be yourself, and try to know them individually. There’s a reason why they are your partner’s friends, and they were also the ones who stayed longer in your partner’s life than his/her family. So try to get along with the gang!

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8. Respect is the Epitome of Love.

First of all, start with yourself. How do you regard yourself, is it with respect? How do you view other people? Do you respect them? Alex Elle once said, ‘The respect you show to others (or lack there of) is an immediate reflection on your self respect.’ This is very crucial in a relationship because how you view and respect yourself will be the way your significant other will view and respect you. Respect begets respect, and in a relationship, before you even start to love someone, you should begin respecting the person first.

image source

9. Quality and Time

A quality relationship isn’t measured with the length of time from the day you started dating. It is measured with the quality you make out of the limited time you have. Remember that a relationship is not only about showing off, but it is all about being with someone who supports you until you reach your goals and dreams in life. The person who is always beside you especially during rough times.

image source

10. Intentions

“Love is the ability and willingness to allow those that you care for to be what they choose for themselves without any insistence that they satisfy you.” -Wayne Dyer

Love is not all about seeking your own happiness from someone. The purpose of relationships IS NOT to have another person to complete you. But to have another person whom to share your completeness with. Before you even start a relationship, you should ask yourself, what are your intentions? Do you take accountability afterwards? Do you take responsibility with the other person? Or are you only looking for your own happiness that’s why you want a relationship?

I remember appearing this in my newsfeed, and actually, it really makes sense.

Credits to the owner, Ogbolu Ezeugo Jerry 

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Don’t marry because of SEX,

Don’t marry because you are getting OLD,

Don’t marry because you are of AGE,

Don’t marry because you’re LONELY

Don’t marry because you need someone to support you FINANCIALLY

Don’t marry because you mistakenly got PREGNANT for him.

Don’t marry because you don’t want to LOSE thePERSON.

Don’t marry because of family PRESSURES

Don’t marry because you Like the IDEA Of Marriage

Don’t marry because of PITY or Out of PITY

Don’t marry because of TRIBE

Don’t marry because you admire all the WEDDING GOWNS you see

Don’t marry because you Love KIDS

Don’t marry because all your friends are getting Married

Don’t marry because of physical/academic qualifications

BUT, Marry because you are READY for it

Marry because of Love

Marry because you want to Fulfill your PURPOSE

Marry because you want to be a Good HELP MATE…

I PRAY TO GOD ALMIGHTY TO GIVE YOU ALL THE BEST LIFE
PARTNERS WHO TRULY DESIRE TO MARRY YOU
 WITH THE
 RIGHT MOTIVES..

Above photo from Snapwire 

5 Reasons Distance Makes The Best Couples

Miles and miles between us
Expensive plane tickets
Long waits between visits
Poor internet connections
Nights spent alone
But you’re more than worth it

1. Because it proves that our LOVE is not just about PHYSICAL CONTENTMENT, it’s deeper than that.

We know very well that love starts with physical attraction. However, when you stayed in a relationship long enough, it will not just be about the looks, but about the character of the person. Love may consist of physical belongingness, but there is more to it than that. When we are away from our significant other, we know that we don’t just miss being with them physically, but we don’t have that security and relief when we know they are just within our reach.

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2. Because we support each others’ dreams

Most of us will choose to stay with their love ones instead of following their dreams because they believe that the essence of love and family is being with them in every milestone they take. However, when you are in an LDR, you know very well that the only reason you are apart is because you have your own dreams to chase and that is not a problem. We allow our mate to fly a million miles away from us because we support them and we don’t want to stand between them and their dreams. Also, we know that we are also one of the main reasons why they’re doing that—to give us a better chance of abundant life when we decide to tie the knot.

3. Because our Faith can move mountains.

Not a hundred pieces of coins thrown in a well can give us the certainty we are asking from someone. Instead, we just give them the chance to be trustworthy while we give them our full support and trust. We know how hard it is to bade our goodbyes when the time comes we are going to be left again. Hence, there will be no choice but to stay firm and keep our faith solid. Because nothing can calm our hearts and minds compared to the serenity we get after short and frequent disquisition with the Lord. We know how vital prayers are when our love one’s away.

I want to hold your hand when we’re 80 and say, “We made it.”
quote from ldrmagazine

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4. Because we will find ways to get even closer to each other despite the distance

While we are apart, we unleash the creative side of us and out of nowhere, we just invent ways to reach each other. Short frequent messages mean the world to us, and we don’t ask for more.

5. Because we value time more than anything else

We know that we have to sacrifice being apart at this moment so that later on, we will not have to do this again. We know that there is an ultimate purpose being apart and this time we believe that there is a tunnel we have to reach, finally getting us permanently together. Hence right now, we just have to stay steadfast and stand the test of time—together.

There are more reasons why we stay in our relationship and we cannot tell you definitely why. Maybe because we love the person so much that we give them the freedom of getting their goals while we also get ours. We know that it takes a brave heart to actually stand the test of distance, and only a few are called for it. Only the brave ones.

“Distance does to love what wind does to fire—it extinguishes the weak and fuels the strong.”

Above photo from Snapwire via pexels.com

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